An Open Letter To My Younger Self

To the 12-year-old me,

I know you’re scared. You just learned a word – gay, and suddenly something clicked deep inside. You realized, this is me. But instead of comfort, it brought fear. They told you it was a sin, that you’d burn in hell. So you buried it. You carried it in silence. And in that silence, you felt lonely, broken, and wrong.

You wondered if you’d ever find someone like you. If you’d ever be loved. If you’d ever be okay.
You even wished you were a man, not because you wanted to be, but because you believed it was the only way a woman could ever love you. You felt like you’d never be enough, never be chosen, simply because you weren’t a man.
You were told your love wasn’t real. That it was unnatural. That it was shameful. That it was a phase. That you were confused.

But here’s the truth:
You did not choose this.
You are not broken.
You are not alone.

At 23, you started to breathe more freely. You opened up. You met people like you. You realized the problem was never you. It was the world’s narrowness.

Today, I write to you with pride in every shade of who you are.
You are not ashamed.
You are not afraid.
You are proud of who you are.
Please remember this:
You deserve love — gentle, deep, soul-filling love.
Don’t shrink yourself to fit into a world that doesn’t yet understand you.
Don’t chase toxic relationships because you feel you have to settle.
Don’t try to be straight because you think your queerness isn’t real.
Your love is not second-best.
Your identity is not a phase.
Your existence is not a mistake.
You didn’t choose your identity – but you chose to be proud of it
Society needs to change — not you.
You are worthy of the best kind of love.
And one day, you’ll look back and be proud you never gave up on yourself.

With love,
Your older, prouder, queerer self 🧡🤍💗